Mistakes

Laws for Computer Programmers

1.  A poorly planned program takes three times as long to finish than you planned.  A well planned program only takes twice as long.

2.  If builders built like programmers programmed, the first woodpecker to come along would destroy civilization.

3.  If one program crashes, it will take equipment with it.

4.  Any program left running expands to fill all available memory.

5.  Any given program, when running correctly is obsolete.

6.  Adding more programmers to an already late project will make it later.

7.  Design a foolproof system and only a fool will use it.

8.  The system which cannot fail, will.

9.  Only fools use foolproof systems because everyone else makes it crash.

10. The number one rule in hacking:  There is no such thing as a foolproof system.

11. Design a hackerproof system and only a hacker will use it.

12. There are no hackerproof systems, only ones that slow hackers down.

13. Foolproof systems are much like alcohol proofs: 100-proof is only 50% alcohol.

Math Puzzlers

1.  The letters a, b, and c are whole numbers in the following puzzle, and abca represents a 4-digit number.  The symbol ˆ precedes an exponent and the letter 'x' represents a multiplication sign.

  aˆb  x  cˆa  = abca

Find what a, b and c represent.

2.  What number less than 1000 has the most divisors?  As an illustration, the number 6 has divisors 1, 2, 3 and 6; four in total.  The number we are after has more than 30 divisors.

3.  Each of the capital letters below stands for a different whole number and the symbol * represents a multiplication sign.  Find the value of M and the 6 other letters. 

ABCDEF      

 *              M
_______
BCDEFA 

Quotable Quotes

"There are two tragedies in life.  One is not to get your heart's desire, the other is to get it."
-George Bernard Shaw

"Sculpture is what you  bump into when you back up to look at a painting."
-Ed Reinhart

"If one is forever cautious, can one remain a human being?"
-Solzhenitsyn

"I don't find any correlation between size and greatness."
-Woody Allen

"If you look just like your passport photo, in all probability you need the journey."
-Earl Wilson

"He who requires much from himself and little from others will be secure from hatred."
-K'ung Fu-Tse

"A man who knows that he is a fool is not a great fool."
-Chuang Tzu

"When there is sugar, there are ants."
-Malayan Proverb

"Don't be afraid about people stealing an idea.  If it's original, you will have to ram it down their throats."
-Howard Aiken

"He who is afraid of asking is ashamed of learning."
-Danish Proverb

"Speak the truth, but leave immediately after."
-Yugoslav Proverb

"He who knows does not speak; he who speaks does not know."
-Lao Tsu

"That which does not kill us makes us stronger."
-Friedrich Nietzche

"Religion without science is blind.  Science without religion is lame."
-Albert Einstein

"Any sufficiently advanced technology would be indistinguishable from magic."
-Arthur C. Clarke

"I'm not afraid of flying.  I'm afraid of crashing."
-Neil Simon                              

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